My biggest pet peeve on social media is when someone says something hurtful and when someone gets hurt, they say, “It’s just Twitter.” People seem to believe that when they say something is their opinion and it’s said online, it doesn’t have the same weight as saying something hurtful in person. It’s so weird.
Words matter. No matter how they’re said or where they’re said. A lot of people think that the taming of the tongue is about censoring them. It’s the whole claim of freedom of speech. Yes, you are free to say what you want. But you are still responsible for the consequences that come from it.
The Taming of the Tongue
The Bible has many verses about being wise and guarding your heart. But one of the verses that stood out to me is Matthew 15:11. It says, “What goes into someone’s mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them.” (Matthew 15:11, NIV) I feel like we often don’t put much thought into what we say. I know sometimes I don’t. I just say things and never think of the weight behind it.
We’re caught up in a world with many different opinions. But it’s gotten to the point that we yell out our opinions louder than making sure someone is okay. This verse puts me on check. The fact that what we say can be more detrimental to us should make us stop and think. There are some things that shouldn’t be said even though we think it’s right. Especially as people who represent the Gospel to others, even something that seems minuscule to us can be hard for someone to hear. Things have consequences whether we realize it or not.
This in general is something I know I have to work on. It’s not about censoring myself but being wiser about what I say. Words hurt even if someone doesn’t call you out on it.
What are your thoughts on this?
Remember when “yolo” was a thing? I still say it ironically because I am lame and think it’s funny. But it got a lot of people’s attention. “You only live once” meant people can do anything, even if it was reckless, because they only had one life to live and should be living it to the fullest. Living your life can mean so many things to different people. Some see how time that is ticking away while others plan for forevers.
Since this year has started, a lot of things have been happening. Not just to me, but to the people I know. But it’s put so many things into perspective. How am I living my life? Am I truly enjoying it? What does it mean to really live my best life? I’m not an expert at any of this, I’m just going to be talking through some thoughts.
Living Your Life
I’m an overthinker. Whenever I’m doing something I always think of the reasoning behind it. Do I need to do it? Am I doing it because it will benefit me? There’s a lot going through my head. I talked about a twenties life crisis before. People in their twenties have a lot of weird pressures. We’re figuring out our lives still but have to act like adults. It’s a weird time.
A lot of people are striving to live their best life. It’s not a bad thing, I’ve said this before. But I’ve never been so aware of how life happens so fast. One of my favorite quotes by Marie Lu is, “You live in the moment, you die in the moment, you take it all one day at a time.”
This year I’ve seen people who were the picture of health on the brink of death. Unexpected things happen that shook up my path. I want to live a good life. A life that honors God and one that I don’t take for granted. Sometimes we get so caught up in what will happen in our future that we forget to live in the now. But at the same time, that doesn’t excuse us to do reckless things because we’re trying to make the best of it.
At the end of the day it comes down to living your life well. Make sure you’re happy with it and not doing things that can hurt you. Anything can happen and we’re all going through it day by day.
What does living your life mean to you?
I like new things. New shoes, clothes, friends, adventures, etc. New is always fun and lately, I can sense a new season in my life. I’ve never been so aware of a new chapter starting, so although I’m excited for the new, I actually feel anxious. It’s just so strange to me to actually see it all happening. It’s like those movie scenes where the person is standing still and everything moves past them like a blur. Sometimes you don’t even know you’re in a new season until you’re fully in it and notice things are different. But in a way, I’m glad that I’m noticing it happen because I feel like I can prepare for whatever is coming.
Subtly, God messed with my plans. He does that often to me. I had a whole image of how life was going to be like at the moment but none of that came true. I’m a dreamer. It’s part of who I am. I create stories that allow me to live vividly. But the light of certain dreams began to dim and I stayed waiting. I have a really hard time letting things go.
This past year has been pushing me to grow up in a lot of ways. God dug up a lot of things that were buried down in my heart. There’s a lot of things I’ve had to come to terms with and let go. I even shared my testimony, which is something I’d never thought I’d publicly do. I asked God to remove things from my life and help me learn more about Him and how I fit in into His plans for me. It’s been a lot of learning. This whole new time in my life almost feels like a test to see if I can put what I learned into use.
Although I’m uneasy, I’m happy. I’m happy because this new season means I’m heading where God wants me to go. It’s been a while since I’ve felt content so I know God’s got this. I remember being in a season of dryness for so long wondering what God was even doing and just feeling so defeated in every way. For the first time I genuinely feel confident in where my relationship in God is and can trust His plan wholeheartedly. I no longer feel like I am constantly asking to feel redeemed, I can finally come to God and know His forgiveness is with me.
Not going to lie, I’m still nervous and a bit scared for what’s to come. But I’ve grown to the point where I can just rely on God on the good and bad times and at the end, He will come through. So I don’t know what to expect in this new season, but I am ready for it.
How do you deal with new seasons?
The idea of a quarter-life crisis seems like a relatively new idea but it’s not. I feel that since life is lived in such a public way because of social media, we see this more often. Honestly, one of the reasons I love the movie Reality Bites was because you get to see them struggling and showing how life isn’t so easy. It’s not the easiest place to be. We’re supposed to be adults with responsibilities but we don’t feel like we know what we’re doing.
That’s what gets us to a quarter-life crisis. There’s so much uncertainty and we’re not supposed to show it because then people will look down on us. It’s a stressful situation to be in. So let’s talk about quarter-life crises.
So what exactly is a quarter-life crisis?
Well this can mean different things for people. Essentially it’s a time in your twenties where you start questioning life. Are you in the right job? Are you friends with the right people? The questions keep going. Our twenties are always painted as such a fun, freeing time in our lives, but there are people that expect us to make big life decisions, sometimes decisions we’re not really prepared to answer. It’s the most uncertain time in our lives. We think about what we have done or haven’t done and wonder how it will affect our future.
What can we do?
Don’t fret. Yes, that’s easier said than done. But you know when you panic, everything gets more tense. (Read Matthew 6:25-34, so helpful) Find someone wise who gets it to talk to. There’s a lot of people out there that may thing you’re overreacting or not understand that this is a serious state of mind, so find someone that can give you genuine advice. But it’s very important to take a second to regroup (in which ever way you prefer, I love trips) and just gather your thoughts. Sometimes we get here because we want to rush life and see it speeding by us, but we really have to stop and see what it is we want. People may think it’s counterproductive but do what makes you focus and what can get you on track.
What do you think of this? Have you ever felt it? Let me know your thoughts!
As a born and raised California girl, I knew heading to the East Coast was going to be a huge change, from climate to regular life. I thought Los Angeles was busy, but I think New York is always on fast forward. I must admit, the first day I was completely overwhelmed by the city and was worried that I wasn’t going to like it. But the city grew on me for many different reasons and it showed me a lot of stuff about life. Here are some things New York taught me.
Always Be Alert
This one is meant to be taken literally. I’ve never had to be so aware of my surroundings until I tried to cruise around New York. I will never get why people can’t wait .5 seconds for the walking light to switch. Why is traffic so intense? Why is everyone always honking? Look, I can maneuver my way all around Disneyland while it’s super crowded while looking down at my phone. Not in New York. I seriously just focused on walking without dying (kind of an exaggeration but you get my feelings). Even when I was a car and not driving, I felt the need to pay attention to the road.
Concrete Jungle Where Dreams Are Made Of
Seriously, every time I think of New York “Empire State of Mine” gets stuck in my head. I’ve always had Los Angeles within reach (fun fact: I was actually born in LA) so I feel like it lost it’s luster for me. New York was the city where things happened. This is where people moved to when they wanted to “make it.” You know what? I agree. There’s something about the New York air that makes you dream. I’m a writer with a degree in journalism, so seeing the big publishers out there just made me love it more. It definitely inspired me to start working harder on new things.
It’s Better to Walk and Enjoy the View
Both figuratively and literally. I love the fact that you can walk everywhere! California is so spread out that you have to have a car to get anywhere. I love walking so being able to do that all day, everyday was the best thing ever. It let me see the city up-close and I got to discover tons of tiny places I would’ve never thought of. At the same time, it made me realize how important it is to just chill and enjoy everything I’m seeing. We so often get carried away by the big picture things, but it’s nice to take it slow and enjoy what’s in front of us.
Is Being Busy Good?
If you look around, you’ll see people hurrying off somewhere. There’s always something going on. Like I mentioned, I enjoyed the chillness of just wandering, but at the same time I felt that I needed to be doing something. I feel like everyone was up to something. It made me think of whether everyone chose to be this busy and whether it’s a good thing or not.
Have you ever learned something while you were traveling?